... which is why I'm refreshing my friends list and considering going to make bagels.

I hate studying. I really hate studying when most of my brain is fried as a consequence of my YEAR OF HELL, and the rest of it is far too busy with higher matters (fangirling out, thinking of boysmut, dreaming up further ways of Making Ken Angsty) to be any use when it comes to nursing law. Still, I have at least come to realize that my exam questions are both ridiculously simple and stupid difficult.

Why so? Because the actual answer to both the 'seen' questions I have is so stupid, stupid logical that I cannot work out for the life of me how I'm going to get essay-type answers out of them. I guess I'm supposed to justify my thinking or something, or back it up in some kind of way. Which is annoying, because the questions themselves have answers which are right more because I know they're right and it just makes SENSE that they are rather than they're right because of point A, which is because of point B, which is because of point C and the thigh bone's connected to the knee bone. Bah.

Ooh. My head feels funny. Maybe I need to eat and have a nap. No. Must be strong. Must study. Which is why I'm writing a Livejournal post.

(Because I want to be Roy Mustang when I grow up.)

But no. I must be strong. I must stop writing this pointless post and go study, because I'm really a focused and professional final-year nursing student and-- Hey, a meme!


1. I guess I have two current screen names, and you don't want to know how many I've gone through to get to this stage. 'laila' is my current pen name; 'quietladybirman' the alias I choose to use for my usernames, because I like having unique SNs. Probably not hard for all those of you out there who know what a stupid Weiss Kreuz fangirl I am to pick up on where 'quietladybirman' comes from. 'laila', though, I took from a character in Angel Sanctuary, largely because I found her intriguing and at that stage my hairstyle looked rather like hers in that it was dark and bobbed. Suffice to say it now looks nothing like that, but I like the name anyway. And I haven't capitalized my user name since I was about seventeen.

2. From the start, my journal's had the title Pale Movies: Side B because I am deeply unimaginative and couldn't think of anything else to call it (and still can't). Pale Movies is the name of my homepage, and the title of a St Etienne song I heard sometime in my teens and have forgotten everything about save the title, which I just liked. Side B? Oh, come on. Weiss Kreuz fangirl. Moving swiftly on...

3. My subtitle? Well, it's why the contents of my head should probably have stayed there. I was always kind of reluctant to get a live journal account - I used to think they were pretty stupid - and caved to the pressure mainly because two of my friends had one and it looked like fun. I was not expecting to end up addicted to the damn site, but even now I'm still well aware of the absurdity of my maintaining this thing when there's nothing that exciting about my life and I don't really have a lot to say most of the time.

4. I never bothered changing the name of my friends page. It's just 'friends', because in all honesty I can't think of any better way to describe it or the people whose posts end up on it. I considered trying to be witty but, in all honesty, I'm flattered enough to actually have people on my friends page. Besides which, I can't see the point. I don't believe in fixing things that aren't broken, which is probably why I'm resolutely sticking with most of the default titles the journal has to offer. Only, without the capital letters because, you know, I don't like them.

5. Honestly, what kind of a default icon did you expect to see from me? I'm a Weiss fangirl, I'm obsessed with Ken Hidaka, I listen to Moonflower far more often than could be considered healthy. Really, I didn't have a lot of choice in the matter. My icon collection alarms the hell out of me. I've got 100 of the damned things and the 70-odd I have uploaded are mainly Weiss Kreuz-related, with a slight deviation into the oh-so-very-AWESOME FullMetal Alchemist. Since I'm getting better at icon design now, though, and possess some nice brushes, I'm thinking about revamping some of my oldest ones. But later.


I want to write at the moment. I want to do so really, really badly and yet I can't seem to settle to anything. Optimistically, I'm saying this is because of the exam hanging over my head and when I've got that done I'll be able to concentrate on the better things in life, such as being a fangirl spaz and being vaguely creative with my Ken Hidaka obsession. I'm hoping this will be found to be the case after all, because I really feel like I need to write something new. I have a head full of ideas and Ken (well, that's noting new I admit) and I can't seem to do anything with them...

Speaking of Ken, I found The Most Terrible And Over The Top Weiss Non-Con Fanfic Ever (Until The Next One Comes Along) yesterday. I proceeded to spork the Hell out of it, and I reported it to marysues because Ken spends the entire fic acting like a angsty, irritating, self-mutilating EmoKiddie!Sue with terrible taste in Hot Topic clubbing gear whose core character traits appear to be 'whining a lot', 'bursting into tears' and 'getting repeatedly raped', but I can't get the badness out of my brain and am beginning to think I'll have to resort to hypnosis, brainwashing or perhaps pulling my head off and throwing it in the washing machine. vermachtnis? It's by the same person who perpetrated that Youji x Omi rape fic you showed me a while back. You know. The one you were going to MST. Which may go some way to explaining my pain and righteous fangirl fury.

Speaking of fanfiction, I need to get on and type up my own fic since I'm doing so little else that's truly constructive. And I will do, in between staring at my nursing textbooks and attempting to look studious (and largely failing), and wishing I was on holiday. It can't be much longer now, right? Right? How long is this holiday anyway?

... hmm, will have to go Christmas shopping sometime next week.

I really should go study. But first, I really do need to make bagels. I've mainly eaten Pringles today and, lovely though Pringles are, I think I'm getting hypoglycaemic. My body appears to be craving sugars and complex carbs and who am I to deny it? Can't study if my head's on Mars, can I? Which means it's food time.