Apparently fandom is exploding again. Or maybe it's Livejournal that is. I don't know, and I don't care. I just don't have the energy for it right now.

I really don't want to get involved. I'm sick and tired (nothing serious, but still sick and tired) and have been since Monday, and I really don't have it in me to do so at the moment. Yeah, I guess we need to make a stand and all that but frankly I'm sick to death of getting worked up about the misinformation and half-truths that get spread at a time like this. I'm going to reserve my worrying for a time when I actually have some idea what's going on. Since I don't, and it doesn't seem like anyone else out there does either, I'm just gonna get on with my night.

Anyway.

I have writer's block. Whoop. This probably isn't surprising since I'm still unwell and living on milk, toast and dark chocolate, which seems to be unaccountably good for nausea. (My body violently rejects anything more substantial.)

The end result is that my body and, more particularly, my brain is running on empty, and that makes writing rather more of a chore than it has to be. I want to write, but I also want to write things which don't suck. A lot. And this is where the problems are coming in. I have this wonderful image in my head I want to do justice to, and I'm not going to manage that if I'm running on empty.

So, instead I've been making icons - having finally gotten over my icon maker's block - and reading random volumes of Death Note. Volume 11 came in the post today, which makes me happy. I was just about to fire an email off to that Amazon store I got it from asking where the Hell my book was. I only bought it from that store in the first place because Amazon didn't have it in stock and they said they'd get it to me quickly.

Lies, all lies. Oh well, I have it now. Ahh, Death Note. FINALLY, I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENS. (Not that this stops me being very confused.)

But I feel alone and think maybe the fandom is not for me. I have no sympathy for Light whatsoever, think he was an arrogant dick pretty much from the word go and just became an even bigger and more arrogant dick as the series progressed. I do not trust anyone who can pull faces like that.

Also, I love Near best.

... yeah. I think the fandom would hate me. Because I love Near best and Misa Misa is my Fandom Girlfriend. (If you don't want her, Light, I'll have her! Please?) Also, I don't seem to want to ship anyone at all, I think there's quite enough going on already without worrying about who's banging who and most of the characters don't really seem to have anything much in the way of a sexuality. The closest I come to shipping is thinking that if L hadn't died, he and Near could have lived in an apartment together and fought crime then gone for cake and the Lego would get EVERYWHERE. And I'm not totally sure that counts.

If it turns out Death Note fans also hate Matsuda, I'm clearly just going to have to stay far far away from the fandom and just, um, read the books a lot or something.

I wish my scanner was working and I was sure of the manga's binding because there are a couple of lovely pictures of Near I desperately wish I could scan. Largely involving the boy lying on the floor and playing with his toys. (I know, what a surprise.) I wish I had them on my computer, though, I want to do something with them. Even if it's just look at them in admiration for a bit.

Since nobody's online, I think I'm gonna try and write now. But I shall stay down here in case anyone wants to surprise me by showing up.