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So, you're thinking of trying Juice Therapy? Want to know if it's the right treatment to maximize your capacity for holistic wellness? Well, five simple questions are all it takes to discover if this simple, yet powerful complimentary therapy is right for YOU. Are you sitting comfortably? Then I'll begin the consultation.
1. Does your current account show a healthy balance?
2. Do you own a blender?
3. Do you have a strong stomach?
4. Are you prepared to spend hours pureeing fruit and veg and swallowing the resultant mess?
5. Are you sick and desperate enough to pay anything for a bit of hope?
If you answered Yes to all five of these questions, then Juice Therapy is the treatment for YOU. That will be £25 consultation fee, please pay the nurse on your way out.
No, I don't think much of complimentary therapies, so you can imagine how I handled an hour-long session on them during college today. You can pretty much imagine my reaction when our lecturer asked us for a two-sentence definition of complimentary medicine - and believe me, I use this term lightly. Complimentary therapies, to me, consist of the occasional good idea in the middle of a morass of complete bullshit peddled by snake-oil salesmen to the worried well and (this is what really gets to me) to the sick, frightened and desperate. The problem is that desperate people pay good money for the sake of a little hope.
The idea of snake-oil salesmen conning the terminally ill disgusts me. People who've just received a terminal diagnosis tend not to be that wild about Western medicine, but that amino-acid clinics and suspect herbalists would take advantage of that desperation is really quite revolting.
Now, I'm not talking about therapies like massage and acupuncture here. Some complimentary medicine has been proven to work and work well, even if we can't say exactly why it does. There's a sound evidence base to support the claims of treatments such as these and so, consequently, I'm not about to dismiss them out of hand just because they don't float my particular boat. I'm talking about things like reiki (I'm sorry, but focusing chi energy isn't going to cure anyone of cancer, though it does make for some impressive fireballs if you're an anime character), some forms of herbalism - a lot of the compounds do more harm than good - and the aforementioned juice therapy, not to mention any other form of 'alternative' crap that a body could dream up that could induce people to part with large sums of money for the sake of a dream of restored health.
(I can't believe how much this shit costs, myself. If complimentary therapies work, why do they have to be so damn expensive that only upper-middle-class professionals can afford them?)
Want an example of alternative bullcrap? Herbal allergy testing. At my mother's advice, my father subjected himself to this a few years back. He was diagnosed with all kinds of weird and wonderful 'intolerances' (2% of the UK population has a food allergy; 20% of the UK population think they have a food allergy) courtesy of some wacky herbalist with some kind of electronic probe. Amongst other things, he was supposed to be 'intolerant' to citrus fruits. Odd thing: he now eats grapefruits for breakfast and enjoys orange juice completely symptom-free.
A far worse example would be that of the girl whose parents tried to control her diabetes homeopathically. I can't believe any practitioner would encourage people not to give a diabetic child insulin. Needless to say, the child went into a hyperglycaemic coma and died.
You'd think there'd be limits to people's credulity, but apparently not.
Anyway. Want to see something cool? Check this out. That's got to be just about all the Sonic the Hedgehog a fangirl could possibly need and believe me, it's the answer to my prayers. Someone up there likes me! *_* I was considering buying a Mega Drive (Genesis, to those of you in the states) simply for the sake of playing Sonic II again. I can't explain how excited I am by the prospect of finally being able to play Sonic games again and reliving my wasted youth. Sonic the Hedgehog refreshes places that other (modern) platform games can't reach. I have got to get this game!
... now, how long is it till I get paid?
1. Does your current account show a healthy balance?
2. Do you own a blender?
3. Do you have a strong stomach?
4. Are you prepared to spend hours pureeing fruit and veg and swallowing the resultant mess?
5. Are you sick and desperate enough to pay anything for a bit of hope?
If you answered Yes to all five of these questions, then Juice Therapy is the treatment for YOU. That will be £25 consultation fee, please pay the nurse on your way out.
No, I don't think much of complimentary therapies, so you can imagine how I handled an hour-long session on them during college today. You can pretty much imagine my reaction when our lecturer asked us for a two-sentence definition of complimentary medicine - and believe me, I use this term lightly. Complimentary therapies, to me, consist of the occasional good idea in the middle of a morass of complete bullshit peddled by snake-oil salesmen to the worried well and (this is what really gets to me) to the sick, frightened and desperate. The problem is that desperate people pay good money for the sake of a little hope.
The idea of snake-oil salesmen conning the terminally ill disgusts me. People who've just received a terminal diagnosis tend not to be that wild about Western medicine, but that amino-acid clinics and suspect herbalists would take advantage of that desperation is really quite revolting.
Now, I'm not talking about therapies like massage and acupuncture here. Some complimentary medicine has been proven to work and work well, even if we can't say exactly why it does. There's a sound evidence base to support the claims of treatments such as these and so, consequently, I'm not about to dismiss them out of hand just because they don't float my particular boat. I'm talking about things like reiki (I'm sorry, but focusing chi energy isn't going to cure anyone of cancer, though it does make for some impressive fireballs if you're an anime character), some forms of herbalism - a lot of the compounds do more harm than good - and the aforementioned juice therapy, not to mention any other form of 'alternative' crap that a body could dream up that could induce people to part with large sums of money for the sake of a dream of restored health.
(I can't believe how much this shit costs, myself. If complimentary therapies work, why do they have to be so damn expensive that only upper-middle-class professionals can afford them?)
Want an example of alternative bullcrap? Herbal allergy testing. At my mother's advice, my father subjected himself to this a few years back. He was diagnosed with all kinds of weird and wonderful 'intolerances' (2% of the UK population has a food allergy; 20% of the UK population think they have a food allergy) courtesy of some wacky herbalist with some kind of electronic probe. Amongst other things, he was supposed to be 'intolerant' to citrus fruits. Odd thing: he now eats grapefruits for breakfast and enjoys orange juice completely symptom-free.
A far worse example would be that of the girl whose parents tried to control her diabetes homeopathically. I can't believe any practitioner would encourage people not to give a diabetic child insulin. Needless to say, the child went into a hyperglycaemic coma and died.
You'd think there'd be limits to people's credulity, but apparently not.
Anyway. Want to see something cool? Check this out. That's got to be just about all the Sonic the Hedgehog a fangirl could possibly need and believe me, it's the answer to my prayers. Someone up there likes me! *_* I was considering buying a Mega Drive (Genesis, to those of you in the states) simply for the sake of playing Sonic II again. I can't explain how excited I am by the prospect of finally being able to play Sonic games again and reliving my wasted youth. Sonic the Hedgehog refreshes places that other (modern) platform games can't reach. I have got to get this game!
... now, how long is it till I get paid?
Current Mood: 
psyched
psychedCurrent Music: sadistic desire - x japan
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