Ugh. I think I'm coming down with something. From the giddy heights of my year and two thirds at nursing college I think that this something is either the Dreaded Lurgi, mange or Foaming Brain Fever. Is everyone getting sick or something? is it possible to contract colds off the various denizens of the Internet? If it isn't, then why is every other person on my Friends list also getting sick?

I'm hungry. But I'm also nauseous. This is not a good combination. Do I eat something and stop myself feeling hungry, but run the risk of being sick, or do I not eat something, feel so hungry I could eat my own arm off, but not run the risk of having to sequester myself in the nearest toilet at some point this afternoon?

Guess it wasn't just the exams after all - I knew I was getting sick.

I'm very tempted to stay home tomorrow. I feel drunk but I haven't been drinking, which is normally a sure sign that I am really not feeling well. But on the other hand, I might not.

I want to post for isotype but I'm not sure what to do. Thinking of starting a blistering argument, or at the very least leading into a very long and pissy rant. I've got a couple of drabbles I need to post for 101_ficlets but it remains to be seen if my disc will work (I feel kind of out of the loop with that community. Already. Yay, go me). I have 100 ficlets still to write. I have an essay to write at some point. I want to get on with 'Seuche'. I want to start my AU. I have too much to write and my head is about to explode with dizziness and general unwellitude. I know unwellitude isn't a word but god damn it, it bloody well should be.

Anyway: in college at the moment. My landlady's son ran off with the monitor, again. Apparently actually buying his own monitor instead of constantly walking off with the one downstairs is far too revolutionary a concept for him to handle. So no Internet joy for me for the last two days. This makes me feel twitchy, because I am sad and pathetic. Still, I've been using the time in a mildly productive way, so it could be worse.

There was something else I wanted to say, wasn't there?

Anyway... today seeth the start of the Public Health module. I'm interested in this (which puts me in the minority amongst my classmates) but sadly I am just feeling far too brain-bombed to really appreciate this module so far. It does not exactly help matters that the lecture theater is overheated and it makes me feel like going to sleep. I feel like going to sleep anyway, so this is Not Good. Pity because deep down I am interesting in public health. I just can't seem to make myself feel it.

I only wish I knew why I was feeling so lowered. Maybe it's because I'm sick, maybe it's the post-exam hangover. Maybe it's the lack of internet access. Or both. Why is it that I feel great after finishing my exams then absolutely wiped out afterward?

Damn, I hope I get over this soon, or I might start writing even more fiendish angst than I have been doing before. I'm not talking the nice, manageable kind of angst I've been writing to date - I'm talking Extreme Deathfic and torment, which I don't want to do because that would just be too, too much. I've heard about a couple of these Extreme Deathfics and let me just say, that kind of torture is completely out of my league. Completely. I just could not do it no matter how angsty I was feeling. I know I like ken hurting but I don't like him hurting that much.

In which case - worse - this might mean that there is but one outlet for my depression and angst. I might get so down and fed up with my life that I decide there's only one way to make myself feel better - I will start writing Mary Sues to fix all my insecurities.

Yes. I might even showing up in my favorite fictional universe (ie: Weiss), becoming their mysterious new teammate under mysterious circumstances of mystery, unleashing plot contrivances a go-go by suggesting that a bunch of highly-trained assassins can't spot the similarities between my cute, fiesty yet angstridden normal self and my sultry, fiesty yet angstridden secret agent self because I have changed my clothes in the interim, being deeply beautiful, charming, lovely and wonderful, winning the heart of the guy of my dreams (ie: Not Ken - even a la Sue I'd be setting him up with Youji perhaps by locking them in the store cupboard together) and calling myself 'Calico'...

... Ugh. No. No, I will never, ever, ever get that depressed.

Now I guess I must go - class starts in five. I still feel sick. Oh, this is going to be fun.